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Last week I was having a quick browse on eBay when something caught my eye. "Black patient shoes!" screamed the headline. "Must see!""Wow!" I thought. "Patient shoes! What are they when they're at home?" I clicked on the link. The shoes appeared. Black they certainly were. But 'patient'? No. Or not as far as I could see, anyway. These, you see, were patent shoes -- as in 'patent leather'. And very nice they were too -- just what I was looking for, and in my size. Did I buy them though? Not on your life. I didn't buy the "gorgeous
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